Tips for Planning a longer stay in France

Every year around now, my residence card/work permit expires.  Every year I block a few weeks to organize all of the previous years of paperwork to create my dossier.  This one inch think binder of perfectly organized papers consists of originals, certified copies, translations, and certificates of authentic translations of dozens of required documents.  It takes some organization and persistence to earn the privilege of living here but it's do-able.

Anyone who has lived abroad is familiar with the paperwork chase needed to get official. Everyone who has dealt with government agencies of any sort know the hoops and jumps you have to complete to get approvals, cards or benefits.  It takes persistence and planning but visiting and living abroad are possible.  There is a huge and diverse community of expatriates and budget travelers seeing the world.  If you've never been abroad, don't worry the water is fine.

Here are some essential steps for planning your stay in France (though these basics generically apply to planning any trip):

1.  Start a savings plan.  Money is obviously a factor in going anywhere but even if your budget is modest, you can still travel to France (or any foreign country).  The more you save, the longer you can stay or the more you can spend during your time abroad.  If it's really a goal to travel then sacrifice is needed.

2.  Make a realistic budget.  Basic costs are food, transportation, housing and pocket money.  Museums can add up to lots of money but can you really see 3 museums a day?  Make a 'must see' list and try to keep it reasonable.  Watching grumpy tourists race exhausted from one end of the city to the other checking off a to-do lists doesn't look fun to me. If it's fun for you, of course that's great.  But if you step back from the hustle of the big attractions, the real charm of Paris will quietly emerge.

3.  Make a creative budget.   People of all walks of life from immigrant fruit sellers at the metro to billionaires live in Paris.  I eat here and feed my 3 year old son on about 250€ per month.  We don't go to restaurants often and I do a lot of my shopping at the local outdoor markets which are sprinkled all over town.  
A walk through a crowded market street with vendors yelling "allez! allez!", or getting a warm baguette directly from the boulangerie is a huge part of the experience of being in France.

• Find out where the locals shop where you're staying and follow along.  A couple of fancy dinners are nice but eating well on a budget is not hard to do in Paris.  The everyday food is excellent, fresh and easy to prepare.
• Use only public transportation to keep costs low.  It's cheap, efficient, very reliable and only requires a little leg work in advance.
• Don't stay in hotels.  You can find private owners who rent their homes when they're on vacation which is usually in the summer when you want to come. Try airbnb.com, HouseTrip, and papvances.com (if you have a dictionary and some basic french).  
• For longer stays, I can whole heartedly recommend Quality Homes International for their excellent service and individual attention.  The owner is French but lived in the US so she can help to tailor to your needs.   A friend in the know recommended these sites to me and there is a large variety www.apariscommechezsoi.com , www.parisautrement.com but I haven't used them personally.

It's not relevant for a short vacation but if you want to stay longer, you need to consider all your assets and goals.  You could be an English speaking nanny or tutor.  You could teach a class in a special skill you have.  You can rent out your home, car, have a lot of garage sales...be creative.  

4. Remember the longer you plan to stay, the cheaper the daily cost.  The flights will be your single biggest expense.  You can spend the same amount on one week in a hotel room as a month in a small studio with a kitchen under a slanted rooftop.  If you're willing to give up the perks, you can have a longer and less hurried view of the city.  If you are willing to give up a little privacy, people are always looking for roommates in Paris and you might make a friend out of it.  If you spend time in a less touristed (but no less interesting) region, your daily cost could go down even further.

5.  Study the language.  When visiting for a week, bon jour, merci and au revoir will get you further than you'd think.  Being polite in another person's language is good manners.  Staying longer means speaking some French.  I studied from middle school to university but didn't actually use any French until nearly 15 years later.  I was rusty but some of it does come back and there are lots of options for taking French lessons.  One of the best ways to secure a longer term student visa is to apply for study at a language school.

6.  Prepare Passport and Visas.   On a visitor visa, you are eligible to stay 90 days and you just need a passport valid for at least six months.  Student Visas, Long Term Visas, Work Visa and Long Term Residence Cards are needed for stays longer than 90 days.  I would have to dedicate a few posts to that one and I'm not an expert so for now, I'll leave it generic.

7.  Be Patient and Persistent.  If it's a goal to travel to Paris and money or circumstances make it impossible right now, that doesn't mean it will always be impossible.  It took me about 10 years of planning and plotting my way to Paris and I've been here now for more than 5 years.  There was a lot of random luck but I also set a goal to live and work here and made choices which brought me closer to the goal.

My next long term goal is to buy an apartment in Paris but that will take years but I'm already taking small steps.  My yearly residence card if renewed will be the next.  Then, I need to secure a 10 year residence card, find a decent job and sell everything I own, while at the same time managing this new co-parenting situation with my ex in Ireland.  

Easy Peasy.

My Favorite French Skincare Products

Like a lot of stereotypes about the French (or any culture) there is a hint of truth to the mythical French beauty.   French woman do not wear a lot of make up.  Foundation is minimal to nonexistent though a powder compact is often kept handy.  Women buy the correct face cream at the Pharmacy, not a department store or grocery.  The focus is on science and ingredients, not marketing so you don't see these brands much outside Europe.  

My skin looks younger now than 10 years ago and that's partially because I have access to some excellent skincare products at reasonable prices.  The other reason is because 10 years ago I was working in Beijing and the pollution effected my skin horribly but that's another story.  My skin is sensitive and combination to dry with occasional hormonal break out in one area.

If you hover over the product name, you can jump to the goods on amazon which I have found to be consistently cheaper in the states than I pay at the local pharmacy.  Volume discount buying, I guess?

Filorga HYDRA-FILLER 50ml $65.49
I have a good friend who is 35yrs old and I noticed recently that her skin looked luminous.  She wasn't wearing make up, she had no visible wrinkles and she just looked fresh.  She is blessed with naturally good skin but something was different and she told me about Filorga.  She got the advice from a Pharmacist in Paris who said many dermatologists recommend this cream for patients after plastic surgery because it works. 

I've been using it for about a month and it's really living up to the hype. It's so effective, I don't really need a separate eye cream and it goes on very light but is moisture rich.  It feels good on the skin, has a very light fragrance and keeps me feeling hydrated all day.  It also proved that many of my issues with fine lines, especially around my eyes was not old age but lack of moisture.  My skin looks softer, more supple and generally feels more comfortable too. 

La Roche Posay Nutritic Intense Riche 50ml $37.99
Less expensive than Filorga and the cream recommend to me by a French dermatologist  years ago when I had some eczema issues.  I used it religiously for five years and was very happy with it.  Lightweight, no perfume and very hydrating.  It's nearly half the price of the HYDRA-Filler  so if you're younger than mid thirties or can't justify the expense, this is a good mid range option.  


Nuxe Reve de Miel Face and Body Ultra-Rich Cleansing Gel for Unisex, 13.5 Ounce $22.00
If you've never used NUXE, you're in for a treat.  The line of products I like best is Reve de Miel (Dream of Honey) because they are gentle and have the most delicious smell of honey.  A little bit of gel foams up a lot when rubbed between palms so this big bottle will last months if it's just for your face.  It gently removes dirt and oil so you feel clean without over stripping the moisture and puts the goodness of honey into your daily skincare routine.  The smell is so nice, it's a daily aromatherapy session.


Effaclar A.I. Targeted Breakout Corrector 15 ml.  $22.00
About once a month, my chin erupts with a few small spots.  I'd rub at them because they were irritating and spread the bacteria around and end up with more breakout.  Then I would use something strong to dry them making it more irritated.  Cycle continues.  Now when I see the first signs of breakout, I rub a little bit onto the points before bed and by morning it's already better and after two days they are usually gone.  Before they even get properly started.  Good stuff and a tube will last for months.

That's pretty much every product I'm using right now with one exception...Philosophy The Microdelivery Peel,  which is not French.  I bought this stuff from an in-flight magazine and I can say it's very effective.  I haven't used many chemical peels so I can't compare to other brands but it always leaves my skin baby smooth and more even in tone and texture.  Except the one time I used in 3x's in one week and it really hurt.  Like chemicals peeling my face.

I don't indulge in luxury brands often but when it comes to skincare, I follow the lead of the experts, French women.

It's Fashion Week in Paris

I live in a very fashionable city.  It's actually fashion week so for a bit of time, I'm in the most fashionable city in the world.

I'm very removed from that industry but have a few friends who work for luxury brands and who are much more connected to that life style.  But it's Paris and it's fashion week so there are lots of fashion people in town.

I went to a party last night and met a photographic manager who's here for work.  She didn't brag about what she does for a living and when I pressed her, she said it was just a job like any other with things to do, people to deal with and lots of day to day tasks to get through.  I can understand that.

I've worked and lived abroad for many years and now I live in Paris.  I have friends back home who think my life must be exciting and chic.  Today I didn't leave the house because my son is still recovering from a bout of Scarlet Fever and he needs a full day of rest before school tomorrow.  I mopped the floor, did some laundry and cooked.  We played with trains, the doll house and painted.
It's not much different than anyone with kids on a sick and rainy Sunday.

I'm grateful to live in a place that many would dream of, just for a vacation.  Being raised in the Midwest and feeling out of place, I dreamed as a little girl of speaking french and visiting here one day.  I never dreamed I would have an opportunity to live, work and raise a child here.  That was a dream too big for a poor, immigrant minority raised in middle America.

But I studied hard, worked and saved.  I took opportunities when they came and did my best to build a life that was meaningful, for me.  I'm not motivated much by money but I love to travel, see the world, meet new people...take risks.  I stumbled into a career that fulfilled these passions and paid the bills so I stuck with it.  It wasn't my ideal job but it provided the money to do the things I really wanted to do.

I lived as an expat during the boom days in some amazing places.  I was in Venezuela just after Hugo Chavez was elected.  I was in China just before the last Olympics.  I moved to London to get some fresh air.  I finally settled in Paris because I wanted to live here and took a pay cut to do it.  Over time, as my company started feeling the pains of the global recession and things got bleak at the office, I knew it was time to do something different.

I planned to take a one year sabbatical, used my frequent flier miles to buy an around the world plane ticket and gave notice to my land lord that I'd be leaving soon.   I was going to take a year off, volunteer, travel and then come back to Paris with my job protected (the sabbatical was in my contract).

Before leaving, I needed to have a full physical and the technician recommended a pregnancy test since I was soon to have a host of vaccines to inoculate from exotic diseases.  The test came back positive.  Shit.

I had recently said my passionate goodbyes to my now ex boyfriend and he had given me a parting gift that I hadn't expected.  I was supposed to leave for Haiti in a few weeks and at that moment I was single, jobless, homeless and pregnant.

It's been nearly four years since I got the news that I was going to be a mother.  It's Sunday night (of fashion week) and I haven't showered, dressed or left the house.   I bet there are a few single moms who can relate.